“All I am is the trick of words writing themselves.” ~ Anne Sexton



“It is impossible to talk or to write without apparently throwing oneself helplessly open.” ~ Herman Melville
Playa del Carmen, Mexico

Okay, I know. I’ve been cheating by plugging in short little posts the past few days, and back-dating them to fill in the blank spaces that were formed by a lack of Internet access. But really, even if I had been able to access the Internet, it just wasn’t in me—the introspection, the soul-searching, the creating. I mean, if I just wrote to fill some space on the page, then it wouldn’t really matter how much of myself I invest, but that’s not how or why I write. Sure, the small blurbs serve a purpose, a sort of checking-in note that I’m still around but have nothing to say, but mostly, I have to delve into myself if I am going to write a real post. Long way of saying I write, therefore I am.

Today is our anniversary—nine years. It’s funny, but it seems that we have been together so much longer. It’s hard to think of a time when Corey was not in my life, and that’s a good thing. We made no plans to go out tonight as Corey had originally been scheduled to work, but his shift was cancelled. It’s been like that all week. He went in on Monday only to work for two hours. He probably spent half of what he earned for those two hours in gas, but the ship pulled out. That’s just how it goes.

Last week he met with someone from the last maritime school that he attended who gave him the names of three places to contact about jobs. They may or may not be hiring, but hey, it’s worth a shot. Still no word from Vane Brothers. I’m beginning to think that that particular job will never become a reality, unfortunately.

So it’s been a bad week for Corey emotionally and for me physically (still with the whole chills thing), which doesn’t make for the best circumstances in which to celebrate our anniversary. That’s okay, though, as we’ll celebrate later.

“We live in a wonderful world that is full of beauty, charm and adventure. There is no end to the adventures we can have if only we seek them with our eyes open.” ~ Jawaharal Nehru
Ruins at Tulum, Mexico

For our honeymoon, we actually stayed in Puerto Aventuras, which is about 45 miles from Cancun. We didn’t know this when we booked our hotel, but it turned out to be better, not as crowded or commercial. Puerto Aventuras is a collection of hotels, villas, and homes right on the beach, and it is strategically located near Tulum, Playa del Carmen, and other places to see in the area.

We stayed in a small hotel that provided breakfast and lunch, neither of which were great, but hey, it worked for us. The hotel provided bicycles for the short ride into the main part where the shops and restaurants were located. I just remember riding back one night, and it was so dark—no streetlights. The other thing we had to remember when bike riding was to watch out for speed bumps—large coils of rope that were placed along the narrow roads.

Each room had a small porch with a hammock. It was very comfortable. Somewhere in all of the boxes are our pictures from our Mexican honeymoon. As with most other things, I have yet to organize the pictures and put them into albums.  One day, perhaps.

I remember that we came back from our honeymoon very, very tanned. And cold. When we left Mexico, the temperature was hovering around 110°, but when we arrived in Norfolk, it was in the 60’s. That was a bit of a shock as we had spent a week wearing as little as possible only to need jackets and long pants when we returned. I would love to return to Mexico for a stay one day, and it’s easy enough to get package rates on accommodations, but the airfare is outrageous, which is one of the reasons why we like cruises so much.

“Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner.” ~ Amy Bloom

Sunset Over Cancun, Mexico

If I had to pinpoint the one thing I like the most about being married to Corey it’s that we enjoy doing things together. We truly like spending time with each other, seeing new things, going to new places. That’s why we’ve always had so much fun, no matter where we’ve gone, whether it was a plane trip to Mexico or a few hours down the road to Chincoteague. I think that at heart, we are both loners, people who do not crave the company of large groups of people; we are individuals who are comfortable being alone. That we are comfortable in our solitude makes us equally comfortable together.

In part, I think that because we are two people who can function alone, we have taken that ability and melded it quite well into an intimate companionship, one that continues to grow and evolve as we spend time together, while at the same time allows us to maintain that perfect space alone.  By that I mean that to build a fire, the pieces of wood must be placed strategically: they must be close enough to pass along the heat, but have just a bit of distance between them to let the air in. When everything is placed in its optimum position, when the spaces of togetherness and separateness are perfect, the fire burns brighter, hotter, and longer.

That’s how I view my relationship, my marriage to Corey. 

So this year, no big celebrations, no voyages to other countries. Just us, here, together. No complaints. None at all.

More later. Peace.

Music by Bob Seger and Martina McBride, “Chances Are”


Grace in Small Things #34

Tropical Breezes and a Warm Blanket?

And for today’s list we have  the following . . .

1. Just finished a snack of a few Pepperidge Farms Gingerbread Men, which are not the same as gingerbread snaps. The snaps are thicker and harder and great with hot tea. The gingerbread men are much thinner and lighter, and it’s very hard to eat just a few because of that. In fact, it’s very easy to eat your way through half a bag of those little suckers before you even realize it, so I am very careful about doling them out to myself in limited numbers. I also hide them from Eamonn.yankee-candles

2. I love finding a new candle scent that isn’t overpowering. For example, I’ve almost burned down a Yankee Candle honeysuckle candle. Yankee Candles are more expensive than other candles, but I’ve come to find after much trial and error that they last longer than candles that aren’t in a jar, and their fragrances burn easily and aren’t overpowering but will permeate the air. I really hate it when I buy a pillar candle, and it burns unevenly down one side; that’s just a waste of money. Other candle scents that I am partial to include peony, fresh cotton, lilac, and lavender. Some of the heavier scents really bother me and give me a headache.

x-files-mug3. Coffee mugs. I love to find unusual coffee mugs, but they need to be of a certain width and thickness. The prettier mugs tend to be very thin, which is nice to look at, but not very good for keeping coffee hot. I have a mug that I bought at Starbucks about twelve years ago that has a nice wide mouth, and it is fairly thick but not too thick. Because it is the same shape all the way down, it has a nice, wide base, which is good because I tend to tip over glasses and such fairly easily. I love this mug and probably shouldn’t have written about it because now something will happen to it. Here’s a picture of another mug that’s been in my collection for a while.

4. My red throw. When we were traveling back and forth to Alexandria for my classes, Corey bought me a red blanket to keep in the car. After class on the ride home, no matter what the temperature was outside, I would curl up in the passenger side with my pillow and my blanket and go to sleep. Now that we don’t have to make that trip, I wrap myself up in my red blanket when I’m sitting at the computer. I suppose it’s become my Linus blanket, although the dogs try to appropriate it whenever they can.

5. My bottles of sand. I believe in buying tacky souvenirs from every place that we visit, usually magnets for the fridge, but when we went to Cancun for our honeymoon, I bought a bottle of sand to put on my desk at work. Then when we went on our first cruise, I bought a bottle of sand in Cozumel to sit next to the first bottle. That way, I always have a piece of the tropics and my honeymoon with me.

That’s all for today. More later. Peace.