Um . . . yuck . . .
“Surely supernovas explode that instant, somewhere, in some galaxy. The hut vanishes, and with it the sea and the sands—only Karun’s body, locked with mine, remains. We streak like superheroes past suns and solar systems, we dive through shoals of quarks and atomic nuclei. In celebration of our breakthrough fourth star, statisticians the world over rejoice.” (The winner of the Bad Sex in Fiction Award).
Related to the first one. So true:
Dogs know: Cats are evillllll:
I regret nothing:
AMAZON REVIEWS AS WRITTEN BY THE CHARACTERS OF “A CHRISTMAS STORY”
by Michelle Said
Red Ryder Carbine-Action 200-Shot Range Model Air Rifle (Compass in the Stock)
The best present of all time!!!!!
by Ralphie (Hammond, Indiana)
This is my dream gun! I have wanted this BB gun for so long! It’s basically perfect in every way imaginable! Not only is it ideal for playing cowboys and indians but it’s also great for warding away intruders! Plus, there’s the danger factor. My mom keeps saying, “You’ll shoot your eye out!” and, I mean, maybe that’s true, but I kind of like that! It keeps it exciting! I need this gun! Please, Santa. Please let me get this gun. I promise I’ll be careful!
YOU’LL SHOOT YOUR EYE OUT.
by Mrs. Parker (Hammond, Indiana)
A dangerous, ludicrous piece of equipment. Only a crazy person (or my husband) would buy this for a child. Honestly. What is the world coming to? Violence everywhere! I can’t even imagine a scenario where this would be a good gift for a little boy. Or an adult, even! What sort of message are we sending to our kids if this is the gift we’d give them? I mean, honestly!
by The Old Man (Hammond, Indiana)
Got this for my son. Good, solid piece of equipment. Had one when I was a kid. You should have seen the look on his face. That alone was worth five stars.
That’s all for now. Enjoy your weekend.
Music by Michael Franti and Spearhead, “Say Hey, I Love You”
- Bad Sex in Fiction Award 2013 – The Winner (kyrabandte.wordpress.com)
- Smut (theparisreview.org)